michelle (idlepabulum) wrote,

fic: Ridiculosity; NC-17; 1/?

Title: Ridiculosity (1/?)
Fandom: Team Fortress 2
Pairing/Characters: Scout/Engie
Rating: NC-17 (mutual masturbation; language)
Summary: Engineer has never known anybody that can rile him up as much as Scout does.
Word Count: 3875
Disclaimer: these characters are not mine, nor do I claim them as such.
Author's Notes: Beta'd by the lovely and divine lefto !

It was slightly ridiculous. No, it was very ridiculous. Scout was very ridiculous. The whole concept of the thing was ridiculous. Eleven PhDs and all Engineer could come up with was ridiculous. It really was though, ridiculous and frustrating and complicated and exhilarating and a little bit wonderful, not that he would ever admit it. It had started with a strange kind of friendship, born from half-conversations at dispensers and then sitting next to each other at meals, swapping jokes and stories of home. Engineer knew it was because he was the only one who really made an effort to be nice to Scout. He didn't believe in being rude, even if Scout was excellent at being annoying. At first, Engie thought he could tolerate Scout because of their similar heritage, (Soldier was presumably American as well, but Engie didn't think he knew the definition of the word 'anecdote') they could remind each other of home. Except Scout might have been from a whole different country, the way their lives had been different so far. Everyone knew he was from Boston and the youngest of eight brothers, but the more Engineer had heard the boy talk of home, the more he'd been glad for his own childhood and adolescence. Sleepy, dusty, big Texas had begun to look like paradise from the way Scout described Boston. Bustling, noisy streets and the ocean and an overabundance of beans—while the concept of streetcars was mildly interesting to Engie, Scout knew nothing about how they actually worked and city life seemed like way too much noise and way too many people.

But still, Engineer liked to hear Scout talk about it. He had no desire to ever visit Boston, but the way Scout's eyes lit up when he talked about it, the way his voice gained that exhilarated note, it was very... enjoyable.

It was a few weeks before Engineer struck 'reminds me of home' from his list of excuses to like Scout.

And then Scout started finding him during their down time, poking his head into Engie's workshop or knocking on his bedroom door and barging in without waiting for an answer.

Engie had always been a patient, calm sort of person. Even as a kid he was quiet and good natured. He reasoned that you had to be patient and gentle with machines, they could be very temperamental if you didn't treat them right. Engineer was unflappable, at least until Scout came along. The boy was energetic, to say the least, and he was one of those people that had a habit of breaking things. Engineer generally didn't get along with those kinds of people. Scout's mouth appeared to be going all the time and there didn't seem to be a thought in his head that didn't end up coming out his mouth. Normally, Engie wouldn't have an issue with just tuning him out, but for some reason it was impossible for the Texan to not be aware of Scout's presence. It was frustrating and distracting because he could never get any work done while Scout was nearby and suddenly Scout was nearby all the time. It was unnerving and kind of frightening as well because for all of Engie's quiet solemnity and unflappability, Scout could rile him up like nobody else had, ever.

Suddenly Engie was noticing somebody else, the way he noticed his machines, it was seemingly effortless to notice everything about Scout. It was just the same amount of attention he paid his machines, except it was a completely different kind of attention. Machines didn't have sweet pink lips or blue eyes that shone and they didn't say your name or pop into your room to say hi or make a point to include you in a conversation. Scout wasn't anything like Engineer was used to, he had no blueprints or manuals or guides. There was no formula to predict what would come out of Scout's mouth or how Scout would react to this or that. It was disorientating and dizzying and frustrating and amazing all at the same time. And it just had to be Scout, didn't it? Engie found himself entertaining lewd, idle fantasies and couldn't help but wonder why Scout was the star of them. Sure he was pretty enough (prettier than anyone else within arm's reach), but he was also obnoxious and loud and cocky and selfish. Engie thought it would have been more logical for someone like Medic to gain his attention. Even though the thought turned his stomach a little (Medic was older than he was, which was saying something), Medic was smart and capable, the only other person on the RED base that could speak Engineer's language. They got along rather well as friends, and Medic continued to be his friend while Scout rocketed up to maybe-something-more. And besides, Medic seemed single-mindedly concerned with Heavy, which suited Engie just fine. Except, that still left him wanting Scout for completely illogical reasons.

And then Engineer's careful balancing act of friend and more was totally destroyed.

“Hey, Hardhat,” Scout's voice wafted in from the doorway of Engineer's workshop (he had just stopped closing it altogether) and Engie sat up, stifling an adolescent fluttering in his gut.

It was ridiculous. Engineer listened to Scout's footsteps get closer and closer until a shadow fell over his workspace.

“Howdy,” he said without turning around and forcing himself to pay attention to the blueprints on his desk. Or at least forcing himself to look like he was paying attention to the blueprints on his desk.

“Whatcha workin' on?” Scout asked, and Engineer was keenly aware of how the boy leaned over Engie's shoulder and put a hand on the back of his chair to balance himself.

“It's an upgrade for the sentries, so that—” Engineer stopped himself before he started a long-winded explanation, sighing instead, “You don't really want to know.” Scout started to answer but paused, apparently considering this.

“Naw, I don't,” he said cheekily and stood up straight, turning to fiddle with a mess of wires that was a half-finished project. Then Scout was quiet, almost contemplative, which was counterintuitive to the 'Scout speaks before he thinks' theory, so Engineer turned to look at him carefully. He peered at the boy, who looked back over and gave Engie a grin.

“I like to hear you talk about it, though,” Scout added, still wearing that cheeky grin and Engie stared.

“Why?” the older man asked, bewildered, noticing belatedly that he hadn't meant to say that. It seemed for the moment that their roles had been switched, because Scout was contemplating and Engineer had spoken without thinking. Scout went blank at that and even blushed a little while thinking of an answer. Engie stared again.

“I don't fuckin' know,” Scout grumbled, obviously upset that he had shown he was capable of actual thoughts about somebody else. Engineer frowned, watching Scout fidget for a moment before turning back to his desk.

“All right,” Engie drawled slowly, picking up his pencil and scrawling a few notes in the margins. Engie didn't have to look to see the consternation pass over Scout's face. You only had to be around Scout for a conversation or two to figure out that if you wanted something from him, the best way to get it was to ignore him.

“It's just—!” Scout started and Engie looked over again, fixing him with a blank look, “It's just that you're, y'know, you like to see... How stuff works and shit, and you don't really talk about anything else like that, like you're really... interested in it.” The words fell out of Scout's mouth like he wasn't really listening to himself, just saying something as he felt it, not as he thought it like he always did.

“Or something,” Scout added and Engie had to stifle a smile at his attempt to save face.

“Ah,” Engineer said, blinking at Scout, at a loss for words. Scout struggled with something to say, discomfort showing easily on his face.

“Don't you—ya know—get lonely?” Scout asked, and Engie thought maybe that was supposed to be teasing, but it really just sounded curious, “Like—chicks and stuff? Aren't they supposed to better than sentries?” Scout was just being his normal, obnoxious self but something about that sentence grated on Engineer's patience. It was probably the irony, because for the longest time Engie didn’t like anything better than the things he built—that is, until Scout wedged himself in front of the sentries and the teleporters and the dispensers.

Engineer stood up suddenly, and the teasing grin on Scout's face fell away when he saw the look Engie gave him.

“Don't see how that's any of yer business,” Engie mumbled darkly as he strode past Scout and busied himself with a broken sentry on a nearby workbench. Silence was filled with clinky metal sounds as Engie went at the sentry with a wrench. For a moment Engineer thought Scout was going to leave, but then he spoke.

“You don't, do ya?” Scout asked finally, his voice teasing, “You don't like chicks and shit more than your... your machines.” Engie's fingers tightened around his wrench and he wanted to ignore Scout so badly. The boy had to see the tension in his neck, had to know that if he kept pushing this Engie was going to snap. The boy had no sense.

“I knew it!” Scout said triumphantly and Engineer turned his head to peer at him dangerously. This time Scout's grin didn't falter.

“You need to learn when to shut that big mouth, son,” Engie said, warning obvious in his voice but Scout showed no signs of heeding it. He was on a roll now and Engie realized this was all just a game to Scout; he wanted to see just how quickly he could make Engie snap. The dick. Engineer was too old for playing games.

“You don't really like anything more than your--your blueprints an'— It's like you're all cogs and axle grease, inside,” There was a bitter note to Scout's last sentence but Engie didn't hear because he was too busy trying to strangle his wrench. Engineer looked over sharply and Scout looked back calmly. He was being baited but Engie didn't care, Scout had no idea what he was talking about and Engie honestly couldn't recall the last time he'd felt so angry and frustrated. An electric moment passed between them before something snapped like a twig and Engie was standing in front of Scout in two strides. Engie grabbed the boy by the shoulder and shoved him back into the wall; the shock and pain registering on Scout's face was like a treat and Engie felt a little of his frustration wash away.

“Don't,” Engineer growled, Scout's wide blue eyes and quick breaths were so satisfying, “Don't talk about me like you know me, like you know all my secrets. Fact is, you're just a stupid kid that likes to get a rise outta people. You got more mouth than you've got sense and yer just waitin' for somebody to teach ya how to keep it shut.”

A silent moment passed between them and Engineer realized that Scout was breathing hard, and maybe that had something to do with the wrench pressed against his trachea. Not hard enough to bruise, but hard enough to scare, apparently. Slowly, listening to and feeling Scout's breaths, Engie's anger and frustration ebbed away, leaving him a little hollow and pressed up against Scout. A blush crept up over Engineer's face and he pulled the wrench away from the smooth skin of Scout's neck. He opened his mouth to say something but felt too ridiculous to think of anything by way of apology or explanation. And Scout's doe-eyed expression wasn't helping anything, either. Engie was just starting to back off and move his hands away from Scout's shirt when the boy sprung into action, hands snapping up and grabbing Engie's collar and tugging. Engineer's hands came up to grasp the wall on either side of Scout's head when he was tugged on to keep his balance.

He was so gosh darn fast that Engie didn't have time to shift before he was pulled into Scout, his lips colliding into the side of Scout's mouth. Engie was about to pull back and fumble an apology because he must have slipped, there was no way— But then Scout tilted his head and corrected the angle and Engie realized around a shocked grunt that the boy had deliberately tugged on him so this would happen, so that their lips could press and slide together and apart, so that he could kiss Engineer. Engie was reminded absurdly of watching Scout on the battlefield, there was so much of that quick grace and exhilarated passion that Scout really only showed when he was running. And here it was again, quick grace in the stroke of his fingertips beneath Engie's collar and exhilarated passion in the small noise he made when Engie bit his bottom lip.

But this was ridiculous, they were kissing and while it was quite enjoyable there were too many questions running through Engie's head. This couldn't be right.

“Scout—!” Engie said, pulling away from Scout and intending to demand some kind of explanation, but Scout wouldn't have it. As soon as Engineer's lips moved away Scout was tugging him back in.

“That was so hot,” Scout mumbled against Engie's mouth, and that explanation was really more alarming than it was soothing.

“Scout—“Engie protested again, but this time he didn't even manage to tear his mouth away from Scout's. Scout didn't even seem to process that Engineer was protesting, let alone react to it. Perhaps Engie should have noticed that he was the one pressing Scout into the wall while protesting a kiss they were sharing, but he was far too distracted by the smooth wetness of Scout's lips.

The third Scout that found its' way out of Engie's mouth could hardly be considered a protest at all; it was more of a moan than anything else. A clang resounded through the workshop as the wrench slipped from Engie's fingers and fell to the floor at their feet. He moved his grip from the wall to cup Scout's head, knocking his hat and headset askew. All thoughts of protest went out of Engie's head as the kiss turned hard and his tongue found its’ way into Scout’s mouth and now Engie was breathless, thoughtless and senseless. It wasn't like Engineer had never kissed before, he had (and done more than that), he just couldn't recall being so agitated by a kiss before. But then, Scout was incredibly agitating when you're tongue wasn't down his throat, so it was logical that kissing him would have a similar effect.

Then Scout did this incredible thing with his hips, arching his back and rolling his hips around and sliding his whole body against Engie like some kind of cat, effectively silencing all thought processes in Engineer’s head. Scout's trousers did nothing to hide his arousal; it was easy to feel how hard the boy was on Engie's thigh. In that moment the age difference between them was so obvious, just by experience alone. It was clear that Scout hadn't done this sort of thing a hell of a lot, judging by how hard he was biting his bottom lip and the high, short moan that he breathed out. Engie noticed in the back of his mind that that should really bother him more than it did. Engineer ground his hips into Scout, reveling in the keening noise he was treated to.

“This—this don't mean I'm gay or nothing, okay?” Scout said, trying to sound threatening but his voice was shaking and he punctuated the demand with a breathy moan. Engie huffed a breathless laugh against Scout's neck.

“'Course not,” he rumbled back; his voice wasn't quivering like Scout's but there was a definite dark undertone, like heated molasses.

“Oh, fuck. Your voice sounds so fuckin' hot when you're turned on,” Scout babbled, his fingers curling tight around the straps of Engie's overalls. Engineer moved to trail his hands down Scout's sides and grip his hips, grinding into him again. One hand slipped around to the front of Scout's belt, snapping it open. Scout's breath hitched a little.

“Say something else,” Scout requested and Engie leaned back to look Scout in the eye; there was a mischievous spark in that blue. Engie moved his other hand in so he could flick Scout's button open and tug his zipper down. He reached his hand into Scout's pants, fondling him through his underwear. Engie was vaguely surprised at Scout's reaction, the way he gasped sharply and the way his head fell back to thunk against the wall, it was almost as if— Engie couldn't help the smirk that tugged at his lips as he leaned in to whisper into Scout's ear, kneading him through his briefs all the while.

“What is it, boy, ain't you never had a hand job before?” he rumbled into Scout's ear and Scout moaned, high and long, before he could stop himself. When the boy actually heard the words he sputtered, apparently having difficulty gathering his thoughts into sentences. Engie grinned against Scout's neck. It was so goddamn satisfying to knock Scout on his ass.

“Fucker!” Scout exclaimed, “I have! Just not like—!” the words dropped from his lips as Engineer tugged his briefs and pants down his hips and wrapped a hand around Scout's dick. Scout slumped forward, burying his face in Engie's neck and making a sound that could have been a whimper. It was obvious that Scout didn't have much stamina (but the whole team knew that already, didn't they?) and wouldn't last long. Not to mention Scout's selfishness was one of his ruling traits, so Engie was reasonably surprised when Scout's hands slid down his overall straps and started fumbling with the latch.

“You too, you too,” Scout mumbled into his collar and Engie pulled his hand away from Scout's cock, ignoring the wounded sound Scout made. He pressed Scout back into the wall and put his hands over Scout's, helping him release the straps. The front flap fell forward and caught on his tool belt, and before Engie could blink Scout's hands were on the belt, fumbling with that too. Engineer slapped his hands away before Scout broke something and did it himself. Scout looked offended for a moment but quickly forgot his chagrin and settled for encouraging Engineer to move faster, fingers gripping Engie's collar again. Engineer was tempted to berate Scout for being impatient, but after carefully setting his tool belt aside he realized his own need and decided to let it go, this time.

“You're not wearing underwear,” Scout noticed dumbly as Engie's overalls sagged around his knees. Engie just shrugged; about to inform Scout that it was just easier that way, but the words seemed to be the extent of Scout's worry and his bandaged hands were on Engie before the older man could get any more words out. Engie couldn't find fault with the way Scout's hands cupped and gripped his cock, and Engineer let himself enjoy the sensations, groaning low in the back of his throat. It had been a while since anybody but himself had paid his 'nethers this kind of attention. He heard Scout's snicker and opened his eyes; he was greeted with a cocky grin.

“Whassa matter, boy, ain't you never had a hand job before?” Scout mocked (in a terrible Southern accent) and Engie couldn't help the grin that tugged at his lips.

“Smartass,” Engineer scolded, grabbing Scout's erection roughly and bringing their lips together in a hard kiss, effectively shutting Scout's big mouth. Scout grunted into the kiss, his free hand twisting into Engie's shirt while the other swiftly fisted the older man's dick. They kissed until they couldn't concentrate on lips anymore and Scout took to mouthing against Engie's shoulder and babbling nonsense. Engineer was again reminded of Scout out on the battlefield, the way his hand flew up and down Engie's length and the way he couldn't seem to keep his mouth shut even when his teeth were sunken into Engie's shoulder.

“Your hands are so fucking huge and hot I bet jacking off is incredible. Oh fuck yeah—nngh, right th—yeah, Christ so good,” Scout paused momentarily to gasp in a few breaths, “Shitshitfuck I can't— It's too good fuck your hands I'm come-I'm coming!” Engineer would have thought Scout's running commentary would be grating but it turned out to be amusing, he could hear the orgasm building in the tension in Scout's voice. He knew when Scout was coming before the boy had a chance to warn him. Scout's hand stuttered on Engie's erection while Engie stroked him through his orgasm, efficiently coating his hand in Scout's come. Engie moved his free hand to his own cock, covering Scout's hand and helping the boy to start moving again.

“C'mon, kid, just a li'l— Ah, yeah.” As soon as Scout had a mind to he started moving on his own but he was still sluggish so Engineer left his hand there, curled into Scout's fingers and his own dick. Engie would realize later that he'd said more to Scout during their little tryst than he'd said to all his other partners during his other sexual experiences combined. Engineer groaned long and heartfelt when he slipped over the edge.

As his vision came back so did his sense; staring at a rumpled, contented Scout with a dick in each hand just had a way of grounding a person. He was struck by humiliation and regret; he couldn't believe he'd just done that, taken advantage of Scout like that, just because Scout was exceptionally good at pissing him off. Thinking about doing this was one thing, but actually doing it, that was a whole other can of worms.

“Uh, Hardhat? You can, y'know, let go now. Kind of sensitive, here,” Scout said as gently as he could while still teasing, and Engie almost jumped. His cheeks colored and he pulled his hands away, taking a step back and looking at his sticky hands awkwardly. He tugged an old, greasy rag out of his overalls and wiped off his hands; it wasn't until he looked up to find a place to toss the rag that he realized Scout was staring at him. Engie blanched.

“What?” he asked, embarrassment leaking into his voice.

“Nothing,” Scout said, ever the petulant child, and Engie shrugged, tossing the come-soaked rag at him and struggling back into his overalls. Scout wiped his hands clean and dropped the rag unceremoniously on the floor, then went about tucking himself back in and straightening his appearance. He looked at Engie again and Engie looked back. There was no way Engie would be able to think of something to say (maybe he would later, lying awake and maybe jerking off to the memory of Scout's moans), and it looked for a second like Scout had thought of something, but then he shook his head minutely.

“Well, seeya,” Scout said with a cheeky grin and a mocking salute, as if they hadn't just exchanged hand jobs. He didn't wait for a reply, turning on his heel and jogging out of the workshop.

And then Engineer was all alone, staring at an empty doorway with his favorite rag and wrench laying on the floor, reminding him that yes, that really did just happen.

Part 2
Tags: fandom: tf2, fic, pairing: scout/engie, rating: nc-17
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